Ordering coffee isn’t what it used to be.

Middle age becomes me — like it or not, ready or not — I knew it had laid its claim on me a full moon and change ago, after sampling a cup of Starbucks “Joy” tea. “Didn’t take,” I informed the barista, “You must’ve slipped me a cup of …

But does a 12oz or 16oz cup of eggnog sound a little too rich for your blood?